I’m at a Crossroads

I’m at real existential crossroads.

I’ve been here before.

Stick with me.

On The Pen has grown from youtube video updates about my starting on Mounjaro (recorded on my lunch breaks at work), to one of the internet’s premier sources for obesity medicine news.

It’s gone from taking up my free time, to dominating all my time. And for what? How does one measure success, when the tradeoff is time away from our 4 children, and simply “being in the moment” with the one I created this dream of a family with, my wife Jennie. Creating content is a rat race. The cheese goes to the most committed, the one willing to put the most time and dedication into it. And even then, you are a captive to the algorithm. The algorithm giveth and the algorithm taketh away.

I know that what we are doing here matters. It matters a lot. You all have communicated that to me, quite clearly. My work is impacting lives, and truly living up to our mission of helping people have more “competent and confident conversations” with their medical team about living with the disease of obesity. It’s a mission my family has sacrificed much for.

But if I’m honest, some days my kids just want dad to be “dad”, and not “Man on the Mounjaro”. Some days, my wife just wants me to notice… Anything! Anything that isn’t the latest in obesity medicine, or social media analytics driven.

The tension is the algorithm. Creators are slaves to it. Working a penance for the hours of time spent creating, in the hopes of receiving mercy from the series of zeroes and ones that have the power to make us or break us.

It’s hard to be creator, dad and husband. Honestly.

It’s especially hard, because I want to be excellent at all three.

But can I be?

I’m going to be praying and seeking what is

right, and for clarity on how to balance all of this.

Listen, my priorities fall to Jesus, my wife, and my kids. In that order.

And balance…

Well that’s always been a struggle.

I live with obesity.